Words

Ephesians 4:29 KJV

People often don't fully realize this, but words are very powerful. Whoever came up with the saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" was quite wrong. Words can hurt. Who can remember a hurtful thing someone said to them over ten years ago? I think most of us can remember such an instance in vivid detail. It is a compelling testament to the power of words. The amount of words a person has during their lifetime is finite, but the effects of those words have the potential to go on indefinitely to influence countless generations to come.

Proverbs 15:1 KJV

Words have the creative power to build up and the destructive power to tear down. How are you using your words? What impact are you making with the things you say?

It is often prudent to be both tactful and courteous. An 'opinionated' person is another word to describe someone who is tactless and rude. Everyone has opinions; it takes an intelligent person to verbalize their opinions in a useful and constructive manner. Emphasize the positive and minimize or redirect the negative. For example "Your customer service skills are stellar. I bet if you would complete your customer contact reports on time, you would get employee of the month and the bonus!" Temper your criticism with praise. As you will notice from the example, there was nothing negative that was said, but the employee still knew what they needed to improve on in order to succeed. I'm not telling my readers to flatter or coddle people; just accentuate the positive and minimize the negative. Here's a rhetorical question: Are people motivated more by fear or by positive reward? You want people to listen to you? Tell them how important they are in getting the job done.

Proverbs 12:18 (ESV) in the Bible tells us that "There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Isn't this the truth? For more about the power of words from the Bible, click here. What I am trying to convey is that words are important. They can even be used to motivate people; either for good like Martin Luther King Jr or for evil like Adolf Hitler.

How do you use words to build people up? Are you tempted to tear people down when they mess up? Or do you tell them how to be better? Here's a concept: People listen more when you're nice to them. Just make sure that when you're complimenting them, that it is truthful.

For your reading pleasure, I have compiled a list of ten positive things you can say:

1. (To a worker): "Thanks for handling that phone call; you're always there when I need you.

2. (To your spouse): "I think you did a great job with the yard work today, you're such a hard worker.

3. Your hair looks great today, what do you use on it?

4. You did a great job feeding me the ball, I couldn't have scored all those points without your assists.

5. You always have such nice things to say, I can't tell you how much your kindness means to me.

6. Thanks for helping me out by working that extra shift; with Jennifer out, I would have had to run reception by myself.

7. You always have such good ideas

8. You're a real asset to this team, it would be hard to replace you.

9. Thanks for refilling our drinks so quickly, you constantly provide good service and we appreciate your helpfulness.

10. I just wanted to thank you for your friendship. It's friends like you who make me enjoy life.